Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Check out my Zumba Arrrrbs!

There's a craze sweeping across this country and I'm in on it. ZUMBA!!!! Yup, I'm an athlete now. I've been to three lessons. And I ran in a quarter marathon once - in a kind of walky-skippy sort of way - but I had a sports drink in a sipper bottle so that pretty much qualifies me as a pro.

Zumba classes started at work a few months back but with having kids to pick up from school, I wasn't able to go along. Most of my friends went and I was left out. Sad. Then Zeeb asked if I wanted to go to a class with her in the evenings - Beloved could babysit. Woo hoo! Zeeb's friend Ren joined us. Yipee! No oldies' classes for me - I'm mixing it up with the hip under 20s crowd now. I love Zumba. The music is awesome and it feels just like a dance party. Not that I've been to very many dance parties - or any dance parties - but if I had, I'm sure it would be just like a Zumba class.

Zumba isn't easy and if I'm honest I'm not especially good at it, but it is a lot of fun. The instructor is a gorgeous little asian lady - Vietnamese or Thai I think - with the most beautiful smile this side of the harbour bridge. How does she look so cheerful while she's doing all that energetic stuff? How does she make her hips do the things they do when she's "thrusting her core"? How come she only has a cute glow while the rest of us are sweating like Jabba the Hutt in a sauna? How does she manage not to trip over during the cool down stretches? 

The gorgeous instructor wears the coolest Zumba gear. She's got the shoes, the racer back top and the cute pants - all with the proper logo. She always has one leg of her pants rolled up. Just one. I'm not sure what that's about. Maybe it's something like a karate black belt. Maybe you're only allowed to wear one leg rolled up when you reach that higher level of double-jointed hip rolling.

I wear trackies - I think that's what unco-ordinated novices are allowed to wear.

It went okay for a few of weeks, then Zeeb had to go off to do a Defensive Driving course and I was too shy to go on my own. Well, that and the lure of "Coronation Street" being on telly. Let's just say I forgot to go to Zumba once Molly and Kevin started snogging on the park bench outside the Rovers.

Zeeb's back in business now so I have been back. I love going to Zumba with Zeeb and her friend Renee. They're fun to be with and I'm hoping for a washboard stomach while I'm at it. However, I was somewhat mortified during a partner segment when I was flying solo. I was happily faking my way through it, skipping and shaking my booty out of time to Cotton Eye Joe, when some do-gooder oldie who had paid her eight bucks to gatecrash the lesson pointed at me and bellowed to the entire class that I didn't have a partner. What the???!!!  It wasn't as if she said it just once. When the lop-sided pants lady didn't hear her, the woman just kept saying it louder until I was sorted out.  

Clearly these are not my Zumba Arrrbs. I have a navel piercing. These arrrbs don't
I wasn't able to go this week. I had an invitation to go out for a banana split at Denny's. What's a girl to do?

Check out my Banana Split Arrrrrbs!


  1. Oh no, you forgot to shorten Renee's name in one bit! EVERYONE KNOWS WHO SHE IS!