"SOMEONE" has some explaining to do!

So I'm back from shaky Christchurch where I played with kids, dug a trench, smashed concrete and shovelled silt. Oooh, it was so much fun!

Meanwhile, Beloved is back from Ashburton (about an hour from Christchurch) where he cooked dinners(!??!!?! He can COOK???), sold junk and spent some time with friends. It's the spending time with friends bit I'm mostly curious about. While I was sorting through his laundry once he got home, I found something unusual:

Black granny undies. Size Large. I'm a size SMALL.

I grilled Beloved for further information relating to this discovery but he remains firm in his denial of any knowledge of how they came to be in amongst his things. For a moment I wondered if he may be trying an "alternative style" but the knickers aren't his size either. I asked if they could belong to a certain lady I know of but he had an answer for that one too:

"They can't be hers. They don't have any frills"
Ahhh the naivety of a man.

I think I know who they belong to. Some friends from church were staying with Beloved and his brothers at the time to avoid accommodation costs. The style suits and I suspect the size fits. Trouble is, how do I go about returning them to their rightful owner? It's a delicate matter...