Is this one of "those" days?

Mopping the floors is good exercise but not when you slip and fall on your butt. I only have a skinny butt and my pants got wet from the disinfectant I'd spilled on the floor. It didn't look pretty. But because I'm such an attention seeker, I'll share a picture with you all. Incidentally, can anyone tell me how to put a caption on the pictures?

I thought it was the return of the boil saga today (long and boring story so I won't tell it). A sore armpit today and yesterday. But it doesn't seem very "boily" so I'm wondering if it's a creepy bite of some sort. We don't have anything too toxic here in New Zealand, although a few white-tail spiders have snuck in from Australia. Don't get the two countries confused. New Zealand DEFINATELY came up with the Pavlova first and Sam Neil and the Flight of the Chonchords are kiwis, not Aussies. Anyway, I have no idea what this thing in my armpit is. It's big and red and hurts and I don't like it one bit so I thought I would chase it away with cabbage leaves, a tube sock and lots of drinks of water.

Drinking water is good for you. Only I choked on it. It blocked my windpipe and I couldn't breathe. During this choking attack, the water I previously guzzled in my bid to get healthy, desperately wanted to come out. I figured that if I was going to die on my kitchen floor, I was not going to die with wet pants (although you'll recall that my pants had already gotten wet earlier in the day). It all turned out good though. While I was...er..."seated for my performance"...my choking cleared the way for me to (don't read this next bit if you've just eaten) throw up...up chuck...do the multi-coloured yawn. What a dilemma! Mid-pee and the need to hurl. I'll stop this story about here. But the good news is that I didn't die, my pants stayed dry and I can breathe again.

What is it with Americans shortening the name Charles to Chuck. Eeeyew!