Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Things Edison forgot to invent

Looks like we're in for a chilly Winter in Auckland. Crisp, sunny days usually start with frosty mornings, which generally result after what I'd call a "brass monkeys" night. I like electric blankets and fluffy dressing gowns. I like to be comfortable. Despite my recently purchased op shop thermals and wincy jammies, there are parts of me that can't escape the chill: my long, scraggy nose and my eye lids. But I'm onto it. I saw something in "Bras 'n' Things" that might just be useful in defrosting my icy lids.  Normally I walk into that shop to look enviously at the undergarments that will never fit. Sometimes I even try one or two on in the hopes that I might have a bit of a depth perception issue in relation to the size of my cups. It never works out and I've never actually made a purchase in that shop...until now. I had no intention of going in but I could see them from the entrance: SLEEP MASKS!

I don't know why I hadn't thought of it before. Remember "The Partridge Family" during the 1970s? Their manager, Reuben Kinkaid used to wear a sleep mask and even then I thought it would be pretty cool to own one.  35 years later I've realised that dream. Now I can wake up with warm eyes! And my eye mask is nearly as pretty as Reuben's pink satin number with black lace trim.

Ummm...I'm not sure if I'm really all that comfortable sleeping in a mask. Can eyes actually sweat? Either that's what was happening last night or my nose was so cold in comparison to my warm eyes that I thought they were sweating. I think I need a nose warmer.

There are one or two things I'd like to invent. The nose warmer is one of those things. It would probably be knitted or thermal but having no idea exactly how it would stay on my face, I googled it. Thinking that I was the only one who had ever thought of this dazzling inspiration, I was astounded to find that somebody has already had a go at this contraption. Stylie, isn't it? I want one - but it would have to be pink to go with my eye mask.

  A bra with pockets would also be useful. That's the only thing I use my bra for anyway. Getting ready for bed can be full of surprises some nights ("Ahh, so that's where I put that pencil sharpener!").  The drawback with the pocket bra is probably that some people might want to fit other things in there besides pencil sharpeners and five dollar notes. I don't know, things like...boobs perhaps? How bothersome.

7th April 2011: Here's another nifty thing that Edison forgot to invent: The Nubrella!


  1. You're a very talented lady and very interesting to follow haha!! Good on you and all the best with your nose/eye warmers...and future bra purchases. Looking forward to reading more, Jodie xx

  2. AHAHAHA The bra pockets are hysterical! My sister-in-law needs one of those. She is always pulling her bank card out of her boobs.